Saturday, October 11, 2008

Let's pencil ya in, shall we?

This, my fellow bloggers, is what happens when one has access to a computer on waaay too little sleep thanks to too much caffeine, an aching pregnant body, and a sick kiddo who still perversely gets up at 7:00am...

Dear Baby,

Please don't come anytime soon. While I know you wouldn't usually hear many *very* pregnant mommies say this to your comrade fetuses (or is it feti...wait, isn't that a party or something? Nope, that's fete, I checked.), I really, really don't want you to come anytime soon. Or really anytime within the next 3 weeks. See, things are just crazy-busy around here for the next bit.

Your dad and I just bought a used dresser for $10 at a garage sale (yay! for good deals) which we promptly spent another $30 on for pink paint and new knobs (not so thrifty, but still yay! for fabulous refurbished furniture). So...we have that to quickly try to finish.

Your Aunt Heather is coming to visit on the 15th (next Wednesday) and she'll be here until the 21st. We have loads to do while she's here, like the OSU Homecoming, and going shopping, and visiting the Oklahoma City Bombing Memorial, and going shopping. I don't think either Heather or I would be very pleased if you arrived in the middle of all that and ruined the plans. Although I suspect Grandma (that would be Dad's mom) would probably be insanely jealous of Heather's good luck in coming out when she did.

Immediately following Heather's departure on the 21st, Daddy and I have the loooong-awaited Neil Diamond concert to go to. I spent a fair amount of money on the tickets last May for Dad's birthday and we really don't want to miss it. Plus...who would we give the tickets to? Nobody who'd cherish them like we would, that's for sure. I suspect they're all a bunch of Brother Neil Unappreciaters out here.

The 23rd is Ezra's 3rd birthday and while HE might think you'd be a super-cool birthday gift, how would I possibly find the time to bake, frost, and arrange 2 dozen allergy-friendly cupcakes while in labor (I'm supposed to relax and concentrate on my breathing, remember)? Not to mention I have to go to the Harvest Festival at his preschool on the same day.

On the 24th is the uber-fabulous Affair of the Heart (I know you're not familiar with the ginormous craft fair in OKC, but give it a while, you will be ;). It's the last chance Mommy will get for a completely baby-free day for a very. long. time. Sooo, it'd appear that week is completely out of commission. Which, really, is probably a good thing because my doctor is going to be out of town anyway.

That leaves the next week, during which I will probably be running around getting costumes ready for Trunk or Treat on the 30th and Halloween on the 31st, since I can never seem to just *buy* a costume like any other normal, sane, 9 months pregnant woman (normal...sane...pregnant woman, huh? I dare you to find even one). I suppose it might not be the end of the world if you came that week, but Halloween is my 2nd favorite holiday and I'd be really bummed if I missed out on the kids' trick or treating because I was in labor in the hospital. Heck, I wouldn't even get any candy 'cause all I'd have to eat is stupid ice chips. Who wants ice chips when there's gobs of chocolate to protect your allergic children from? Not me, that's who.

So, dear little one, that leaves us the following week. Since I've hit that not-so-fun, uber-uncomfortable stage (ya know the one-where every smile is really a hidden grimace), I'm thinkin' there's no need to go very far into it at all. How's November 1st looking for you? It's sure looking good from this angle, so why don't I pencil you in? I figure all that trekkin' around the night before can put me into labor and we can pop you out by the morning of the 2nd at the latest. While Mimi (my mom, remember?) just cackled when she heard I was 1.5cm dilated and 50% effaced at yesterday's doctor visit and Daddy just groaned as he still has so much to do before you get here, I have complete faith in you to make the right decision and come when you're told to, as any good obedient baby would.

With all the love in my heart and the aches in my over-burdened joints,

Your Mommy

PS-don't worry, I told Daddy that being minorally dilated isn't unusual at all and doesn't indicate much when it comes to delivery dates. He's just being a guy (which I realize might not mean much to you at this point in time, but don't worry, it will ;).

14 comments:

Zachary said...

Dear Mommy-

I talked to Heavenly Father and He said He had a plan...and that it would be ok.

With Love and Excitement to Meet You-

Baby

Deb Nott said...

Dear Mommy -
After 2 kids you still think you are in charge...tisk, tisk, tisk...oh Mommy, that is why Heavenly Father is sending me! I love you!
See you soon...
Love,
Baby

kristin said...

I wish I was closer to help you out! You'd never have to worry about me feeding your kids "poison" or anything. Good luck with everything - give me a call if you need to vent :)

The DeVito's said...

That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time! I truly enjoy your writing. Thanks for the laugh!

Alabama Apples said...

My goodness...I haven't laughed like that in a while! I wish I could keep you in my pocket (although it would need to be a largerish pocket to fit you AND baby) Tell Spence that it could wait until longer...Maybe just a week early? Love you! Thinking of you all the time!

coty said...

I can't even catch my breath I'm laughing so hard. WHITNEY, holy cow! you SO have to know you just jinxed yourself; you'll be in labor by next week for sure lol. Was that reverse typology? it's so not going to work...

Kristyn said...

Busy girl! I still can't believe you're pregnant with baby number three. You're a lot braver than me! I hope this little one comes at a good time! Oh, and I emailed the engineering video to my friend who posted in on her blog where LOTS of people got a big kick out of it. Thanks for the tip off - it's still so funny to me, and I'm not even married to an engineer!

Aubrey said...

I will totally sneak candy in to the hospital for you! Because I'm just that kind of a friend. Don't worry babe, everything will be alright.

The Wright's said...

Wow sister! Don't be surprised when baby shows up early! You did ask for it! (although I hope not for your sake!) Good luck!

Gretch said...

LOL! Love the letter. Good luck with that. :) Isn't it funny that we don't anticipate the coming of the 3rd like we did the first, although we love them all the same. I hope that #3 comes after your craziness.

btw what did you do for your Super Saturday? I have the same calling and our first one is coming up in Feb and lets just say I don't do crafts...

Anonymous said...

Only you would wish that baby girl would wait a little bit longer whitney. She is one lucky little girl to have a mommy like you. Good luck on your many adventures in the next few weeks. don't forget, you have lots of helpers around you.
sister hillock

T-Mac said...

Love that post! Hope you're feeling alright!

Julene and Gabe said...

Aaah what a cute post. I'll cross my fingers he'll be an obedient little baby!

Leah Florence said...

Hehehe, you are making me laugh, I love the way you write. I hope baby listens because you really sound busy!