Tuesday, May 21, 2013

The Invisible Mom

Allow me to muse for a moment...

So, despite my lack of postings, I've been going through pictures trying to figure out what to post, and I've realized something...

I'm invisible.

I'm not sure why, but I'm never in any pictures.  Often, around the house and at our small family events, it's because I'm the one behind the lens (unless, of course, I want pictures from very far away of very small people with awkward poses.  Sorry, Spencer, my dear, but you know it's true).  But, almost as often, especially at bigger family events, I'm not taking the pictures, but I'm still not in them.  I'm not sure why, exactly, but I've been thinking about it as I sorted through another batch of photos tonight.

I've decided it's because I'm The Mom.

I'm the one that's giving the kids stern looks when they're acting up.  I'm also the one dealing with the tantrumy kid in the corner while everyone else is playing with the happy ones.  I'm the pregnant one sitting at the table absolutely exhausted by the end of the night.   I'm on the sidelines keeping the toddler safe while the older kids test their luck. I'm lagging a bit behind on the walks and hikes because I'm waiting for the slowest kid.  Who wants a picture of any of that?  no one, obviously.

I'm not whining because, for the most part, I don't mind so much.  I'm not in pictures because pictures are where all the action is, where the fun is at and, let's be honest, moms aren't really in those two places all that much.  That's a place for Mowglis and Uncles and Dads and super-fun Aunts (the ones who are more fun than me, anyway).  Moms are just a more behind the scenes and on the sidelines sort of group.  It's just life.

Sometimes though, I wish it wasn't.

6 comments:

holyoak said...

Interesting insights Babydoll. You sure

Kristin Hanson said...

Word. Its one of those seasons in life and I love it, even if I only have three pictures of myself from any calendar year. Aside from a few preggo shots or post birth.

holyoak said...

oops.../
you sure were in your share of them when you were a child. We will do better and include you in the pictures. However, you need to avail yourself as well. I think the biggest reason is that you are behind the camera taking many of the pictures or directing the action.

Tony and Janna Long said...

Oh huney... I totally agree! Why is it that there never seems to be a break, a vacation, for moms? even on holidays and vacations and family trips when memories are being made and fun is being had... we still have to be the MOM! It is exhausting, isn't it? I guess my advice is this: one day your babies are gonna want pictures of their mom. they are gonna wanna remember YOU... lagging behind to watch the slowest kids, stern face and all keeping the naughty kids in line, pregnant and exhausted sitting on the sidelines. They are gonna wanna remember that you were always there for them, always concerned for them, that everything you did was for them, that fun and selfishness was put aside for THEM! They are gonna wanna see and remember you for exactly what you are- (always in the fun or not) the unselfish, loving mom you are! So make your hubby take the camera, get up and get in those pics, force people to crowd around your arm as you hold the camera out! You are gonna wish you did someday! :)

Jill Pierce said...

This is typical. You're a great mom, though! Hang in there.

Kim said...

Ah! I'm the culprit! I just looked through my last post and realized that there are ZERO pictures of you! ZERO. Not even an elbow! Which is a crying shame, cause lets face it, at Ma and Pa Lifferth gatherings, you are definitely the most stylish person there. Here's to vowing to take more pictures of EVERYONE...Love, Kim