To my Ezra, on his 4th birthday

4 years ago today, at 8:08am, the doctor took you from my body and made me a mommy. That was the day my universe shifted. I had no idea how my life would change. Does any mother, really? One day, little man, they'll hand you a squalling newborn and you'll begin to grasp what I've talked about all these years.


Ezra, you screamed for the first 5 months of your life. I was kinda upset at the world that first little bit...but never at you. You were my ray of sunshine in that freezing cold, dark, little basement apartment. I slept, ate, and breathed you. You were the reason I got up each morning. I know you love to hear it, so I'll say it again-you spit up everywhere and on everything. You were soaked just barely after we'd get you dressed. Your grandma used to chide us that you were sopping wet and it was freezing cold outside. She was right, it was freezing and you were sopping. We'd change your outfit because it'd make her happy, but we knew you'd soak your clothes again within the hour. You were like our little toy, Daddy was always dressing you up in little outfits he'd think up, his wedding ring becoming your monocle and your burpie the Pope's hat. You were so pudgy and adorable. You had the biggest thighs I'd ever seen on a newborn and there was no mistaking that you belonged to anyone but your Daddy. After we hit about 5 months, you seemed to decide that the world was an alright place and you figured you might stick around for a bit. That's when you became happy. You were still my temperamental little man (what else is new?), but you were suddenly a happy baby and everyone in our new ward fell in love with you. You were so sick so often that first year, but you just smiled through it all. You were our little trooper and it wasn't long before all the nurses at the BYU Health Center knew you by name. By the end of the first year, you brought me so much joy, I couldn't help but want another one. You made me *that* happy.

"[cough, cough] I think I'm getting the black lung, Pop. It's not very well ventilated down there."

Takin' a hike at Bridal Veil Falls

Reading books
(which, other than destroying things, was your very favorite pastime)

Ezra, honey, I can't believe you've been in my arms now for 4 long and short years. You're such a smart, independent, stubborn little boy. You're always shocking and amusing me with the things you say and the ideas you come up with. You're such a wonderful big brother. You love your sisters so much, and they're so lucky to have you. The girls just adore their Ezzie. You have helped me grow and learn so much. Thank you for choosing me as your mother and us as your family.

The birthday boy

We love you sooo much, sweetheart! Happy birthday, my big 4 year old!

Love, Mom